Ancestral Palace (South Wing)

She clung to him, and for a moment, it was like old times again. They were hurt, but they would be alright. They were family.

And then, something changed. He didn't see it - it was far too dark - but he could sense it. Something about her changed. And the sense of this was far more like a more recent past...

And then she spoke, and he knew.

Satsuei.

He weakened. And his face changed expression several times in a short period as his mind wavered.

"I...don't care if you mind is in another place...or another time," he managed to get out, just holding on. "You are still...Yeosin-san."

Why don't you let me treat her properly?

And who knew what that would entail? Japan didn't want him to take control. He didn't want Yeosin to get hurt any more than she already was. But it was getting harder to push that one back.

He wavered again.

---

Which Kiku will it settle on this time? We shall see.

He was able to do something she could not. He was fighting his other self and winning. Not only that, but even with her mind in the state it was, with her body taken over by that other self, Honda Kiku saw her as Yeosin.

But she could hear the quiver in his voice. He was struggling to hold the other Kiku back. How long would it be, she wondered, before he gave out? How long until they both collapsed under the strain of the past?

What is it that haunts his waking hours?

"Why do you fight it? He is you, don't you realize that? That sorry miserable wretch is the same person as you, so why don't you let him out?!" Satsuei screamed.

She growled low, but would not let go of him. It was that damn empress' fault! How long would she continue to hold out?

"Why won't you just fade? You, who wants to reconcile with this...this monster! This is the man who broke us! This is the man who took everything from us, Yeosin! Why won't you understand that?!" Satsuei screamed.

I do understand. That is why it is so difficult. This is my brother, my beloved family, yet he did such...such horrific things to me and my people.

"Then let me go! Let me be free, and I will repay every hurt, every torture, every humiliation!" Satsuei grabbed Kiku's throat.

And then what?! What happens when, after all that, the pain still remains? We cannot go back.

We can never go back.

He wavered. He wavered and struggled with his mind while she spoke.

He wanted to say something to her - to try to reach Yeosin, who was in there still. But he couldn't find words and struggle at the same time.

His head hurt.

And then her hand was at his throat again.

He was stuck for a moment in time. His mind processed nothing but the sensation of being choked.

And once again something changed.

Suddenly his hand grabbed her wrist and twisted it back. Hard.

NO!

"You missed me so much, did you Satsuei?" the words came out of his mouth.

Japan struggled, but to no avail. The other was in control.

"You know, he was actually feeling bad for you? Feeling guilty? Stupid of him. Obviously, there's only one kind of treatment you understand."

Her wrist was twisted back farther, his hand even tighter around it.

She wasn't sure what happened. One minute, her hands were clenched around Kiku's neck, the next, her wrist was about to break. Gasping, she tried to maneuver her body to relieve the stress, sitting up straighter and trying to shift her arm. He was saying something. Kiku had felt sorry for her? The stress on her wrist grew. She cried out in pain.

"I...I knew it...you see, Yeosin? He is still as cruel as ever..." she choked on her own words, trying not to scream.

No! Please...not again...

There was a sickening crack. Her mouth opened in a silent scream. Still, he would not let go.

"Let go of me, sasaeng-a! You still haven't had enough, have you?"

Kiku...Kiku...why are you doing this to me? Why is this happening again?

"It's happening because you let it happen, Yeosin. You let him in to this place. All you had to do was tell Nambu to throw him out, but you let him in. YOU LET THIS BASTARD INTO OUR HOME!" Satsuei screamed, raw and desperate.

I didn't! I wouldn't. He followed me...I...Nambu let him...the guards...the, the gatekeeper!

"No. This is your fault Yeosin. Once again, you have failed to protect not only yourself, but your people. What do you think he will do to us this time? How long until he has broken us completely? Do you understand Yeosin? You let him in.

Satsuei struggled, trying hard to free herself. Yeosin was unresponsive, shocked by the entire situation.

"This game we play, Yeosin, it is dangerous."

But...we still have time! If you try and reach Kiku, my Kiku, we could still...!

"You don't understand! We have no more time, Yeosin. Look there, above his head..." Satsuei nodded towards an object glinting in the dark.

It was a clock. Worn and old, but the numbers stood clear as day.

And that was when Yeosin noticed it. There was no more tock tick. The hands were eerily still. A heavy silence was all that met her ears.

"You said it yourself. We can never go back."

You let him in.

You let him in here, into your home.

You did it yourself.

...

And it's too late to take it back.

A cruel smile played across his lips. His free hand reached to his hip to clutch at nothing.

"Dammit, Kiku...why do you have to be such an idiotic...girl now? Weapons aren't for display!" He let out a sound of annoyance.

I'm pleased to hinder you.

"Che. No matter. It's not neccessary. There's still plenty I can do without it." He brought the hand he had just moved up to his face and looked at it. "This body may have grown weaker due to your idiocy, but hers even more so. I'm sure I'll think of something..."

The wrist currently in his hand felt broken. He let go and slammed her into the wall.

"Oh, Satsuei. You have no idea how infuriating it is to be stuck inside someone that's obsessed with cute things. It could drive a guy crazy, you know?"

He twitched.

"Her name is Yeosin." It was said out loud.

Wait...he said something out loud again?

But the surprised of that realization lost him again.

"Never mind him...where were we?" He gripped her hair.

If I did it then, I can do it again.

---

For reference, I think black!Kiku is being rather more...verbose?...than he used to be. Like he's been affected by something.

She gasped as he slammed her into the wall.

"You are already crazy," she hissed.

For a brief moment, Yeosin recognized that glint in his eyes. Kiku had regained control, but it wasn't to last. She felt him grab her hair in his fist. She whimpered. She didn't want this.

"L...let go of me. Let go!"

she tried to struggle, but his grip was tight. Tears stung her eyes, but she refused to cry. She wouldn't give him that satisfaction. She was a warrior too, dammit!

That was a long, long time ago...

"I don't care. We once were united, Yeosin. We were a warrior state. Even when we were divided amongst the Three Kingdoms, we were warriors. We fought back then. We were strong back then."

...

Yeosin was quite. She remembered those days. She remembered the feel of armor, her weapon in hand. But she also remembered the bloodshed. The secrecy. The alliances. The backstabbing.

"We used to fight, but now we are weak because of you. This is all your fault!" Satsuei growled.

She bucked against Kiku, twisting in his grip, attempting to kick him, but her leg had fallen asleep. All she could manage was a weak shove.

"Help me, Yeosin! Help me fight him off! I don't want this. Not again," Satsuei screamed, tears threatening to spill.

She was terrified. Memories keep invading her mind. She couldn't breathe properly. It was stronger than ever. All the cries. The screaming. That damn cruel laughter. And that hiss. That soft, icy hiss.

Satsuei...

"Already crazy?" he asked. "Perhaps. But then, so are you."

He used his grip on her hair to yank her head to the side.

"The difference is? I'm not stupid."

What could he do to gain control again? This shouldn't be happening...This wasn't...

The Past...

What was that from before? tock tick tock tick

But that wasn't right. Trying to turn back time was useless. Impossible. But they couldn't stay like this...

They needed to move forward...

tick tock tick tock

"Kiku was stupid to come here as well."

What got him into this situation?

If I'm stupid, then so are you.

His face dropped the smirk. His hands relaxed their grip on Yeosin, no longer causing pain.

What?

"Yeosin-san," he implored. "If you think that we can't go back to the way things were...before...you're right. It's impossible to go back. But it's not hopeless. We need to move forward, Yeosin-san."

But...you can't possibly be admitting that we are the same.

"We need to accept the past, and move forward."

You can't be.

---

I apologize that I didn't respond to you last night. I had it open and had started my reply, but then it was late and I had to get to bed before finishing.

I think Japan trying to deny or seperate himself from his past has prevented him from moving forward.

Satsuei's eyes widened. Kiku had regained control. Move forward? How was she supposed to move forward? She had so much hurt, so much anger, how was she supposed to just let that all go?

It was different for Yeosin. Satsuei had, in the very least accepted that it had happened. Satsuei was just angry. Where did that leave Yeosin? Why was Yeosin stuck in place?

"You know the answer to that question, Yeosin. We both know the answer to that..." Satsuei stopped struggling.

I have accepted what has happened. I am not as angry or hurt as you...

"Listen to me, Yeosin. You have not accepted anything."

I have! I have accepted everything that has happened. This is not my fault! This is your fault. You are the reason why I can't move forward.

"...and who is responsible for my existence?" Satsuei sighed tiredly.

Kiku. Black Kiku.

"No, Yeosin. How long do you intend to play this game? Haven't you grown tired of it yet? How many more years, Yeosin?"

What do you mean? We only started this...this game of yours today!

"You are more of a fool than I thought, Yeosin. You may not have realized it, but you have been playing this game for a very long time."

Satsuei didn't know what exactly Kiku struggled with, but she knew exactly what haunted Yeosin's waking hours. She shared the same nightmares. She dreamed the same dreams. The tears and laughter, anger and hurt. All of it was the same.

"Yeosin, do you understand, yet? Time has moved backwards. Why is that important? What happened, Yeosin, that has brought us to this point?" Satsuei's voice was ragged and tired.

I don't know.

"What happened, Yeosin? Why are we here, in the past, dwelling on times long gone? Why am I here, Yeosin? What did you create me for, because that is indeed what happened. You created me. I exist only for you. Not for Kiku. Not for Black Kiku. Only you, Yeosin. Only you..." Satsuei's voice broke with emotion.

And somewhere in the back of her mind, under lock and key, Yeosin knew the answer to that question. But could she face it?

You exist because I created you.

You exist because I needed you.

I needed you to be the one to bear the pain and grief I, myself, could not handle.

"Dammit, Yeosin! How much longer?"

Until you go away!

"I'll go away when you accept the past. When you accept me!"

No!

"How much longer will you insist on playing this game, Yeosin?!"

This is your game, not mine! You are the mastermind behind all of this!


"I AM YOU!"

---

No worries. Sleep is important!

Anyhoo, I'm sorry this is such a long effing post. I couldn't find a good stopping point.

Yeosin seemed to be locked in a debate with herself. He wondered what she was saying in there. He wondered what he should say now.

Oh come on...don't you want to say she's stupid? Seriously...like it was her fault that I came out today in the first place. If she hadn't tried to choke you, her wrist wouldn't be broken right now.

No, that wasn't what he wanted to say. But Japan acknowledged now that there was a part of him that thought those things.

A part of him. Not someone else entirely. Not a stranger in his body.

The voice inside him started humming the national anthem. But that was alright. He had accepted that already.

"Yeosin-san," he spoke to her again. "I did horrible things to you in the past. Unspeakably horrible. Things that I tried to ignore and repress so much that I actually forgot a decent amount of what happened. Because I had changed, I thought to myself that no, I couldn't have possibly been responsible for such things and disassociated myself with them. But it was me that did them. Which is why things can never go back to how they were before that. We can't turn things back."

He let her go completely and took a couple of steps back.

"But I hope we can move forward."

She stopped arguing with herself. Kiku was admitting what he did to her was horrible, and that he was the one responsible for his actions. The pressure was gone. Looking up, she noticed Kiku had released her and stepped away. Tears welled in her eyes.

"You see, Yeosin? Those things happened. Kiku is learning to accept them, so why can't you?" Satsuei whispered sadly.

Yeosin was quite for a moment, but she could feel Satsuei relinquish control of her body.

"Kiku? Kiku...I can't. Please! It hurts so much Kiku. I tried. I really did, but it scared me. Every night, I closed my eyes and I heard them. I heard my children screaming. I heard them dying. Each night, I was forced to watch as my country slowly fell apart again. I had to sit by as my people lost their culture, their names," Yeosin fought back tears.

But it is over now.

"But it's not over. Kiku, those dreams still haunt me. You gave me the name Satsuei, but I created the person Satsuei. I still need her. My mind is not strong enough to deal with this. I can't face the past alone. I can no longer fight my own demons."

Yeosin was silent for a moment.

"I haven't the strength to continue the game, yet I haven't the courage to stop. Where does that leave me, Kiku?"

"I don't know," Japan answered quietly.

Was he in any postion to give her advice? Did he even have the right to? Maybe...maybe if he just talked? It was already something he wasn't used to doing. But he would do his best.

"I don't think I can completely let go either. I've managed to admit that he's...a part of me, but I don't think I can get rid of him. I think I'd need to...absorb him? And I don't think I can do that." He paused, considering. "I don't think I want to do that. So I guess that means he stays."

He sighed. The voice in his head was quiet.

"I'd like to say that I could help you face it, but I'm not sure you'd want that. And I'm not sure I have the right to say that...I don't really know why I'm saying it now. I..."

He closed his eyes briefly. And for the first time since he first looked at her palace that day, no images greeted him. It was a relief.

If only Yeosin could feel the same relief.

"I'm sorry, Yeosin-san," he told her. "I know that those words can't even begin to cover what happened, but I am sorry."

He had apologized before, to her Southern son, whom Japan saw as insufferably childish. He hadn't been taken seriously. Apologizing to Yeosin felt much different.

"I know. My son told me you had apologized, but he thought it was joke. At the time, I agreed, but now...that you are even here is proof."

He wouldn't be here, her quite little brother, if he didn't mean it. He wouldn't be trying to talk to her if he didn't feel some regret. She knew that, and for the first time in many years, she felt thankful towards him for something.

"But is it okay like this? I don't want to be rid of her, nor do I want to absorb her, but she is my crutch."

We all need someone to lean on from time to time...

"I want to walk forward with my own two feet, driven by their strength, not the strength of others."

Why is it you think this has to be done in a day?

"But first I must learn to stand again."

You can not stand when you are weighed down by baggage, Yeosin. You need to say it. For his sake as well as yours.

"Honda Kiku, I can't forgive you just yet. Even so, I still love you because you are my precious family."

It is a start, but someday, Yeosin, you two will have to face the past.

"One day, Kiku-nim, we will discuss these matters furthur, but for now, we must get out of here."

She looked away, a light blush adorning her face.

"But it would seem I haven't the strength just yet to stand on my own...will you, will you help me, Kiku-nim?"

Japan couldn't see Yeosin's face in the dark, but her words caused him to pause and blink at her for a bit. She was asking for his help?

"Ah...yes."

He reached out his hand and clasped hers...the one that still had a good wrist...and the thought of that caused another wave of guilt. Then he helped pull her up to her feet.

"I can't expect you to forgive me," he told her. "If you ever do someday, then it will make me very happy...but I can't expect it of you."

He looked in the direction he had came from and then back at Yeosin. "Shall we go back to the South, then?"

Thankfully, Kiku used her good arm to help her up. Her wrist still throbbed with pain. She would have to get that looked at when she returned to her living quarters. For now, she just focused on getting back. Turning, she began to lead Kiku through the maze of darkness, hoping nothing more would happen to them until they got back to the South.

The closer they got to the gate, the easier it was to walk and breathe. The stifling atmosphere began to dissipate, but she could feel someone watching them, and it was not her son. No, her son was standing in front of them.

"You must hurry, mother. Jinhong-ui Gisa is out for Honda-nim's blood," he told her before retreating.

Picking up the pace, Yeosin kept a sharp eye out for Nambu's twin brother. If the man was aware of Kiku's presence, it would only be a matter of time before he found them.

With a final burst of energy, the two made it out of the compound and into the North's Courtyard. She could see the gate, but she could hear yelling.

"Kiku-nim, I think it would be best for you to run ahead."

The presence of Yeosin's Northern son put him on edge for a moment, but he just warned them and disappeared.

...Who was this person that was apparently out for his blood? He didn't ask for now, just continued on with Yeosin.

And then there was the yelling. The gate in front of them, Yeosin told him to run ahead.

"Then what about you?" he asked her. "I felt what it was like in there...it affected you as well...if they detain you..."

He knew, or at least supposed, that the people following them wouldn't harm Yeosin. They would probably harm or try to harm him. But he couldn't have her stay behind here. Especially when they were so close.

He made a decision. He summoned what strength he had and picked her up into his arms. Then he ran as fast as he could with her past the gate into the South. He heard the yelling get louder as he ran. Unhindered, they were faster than him. But he managed to pass the into the South safely. Only then did he stop and put her down.

"I...wasn't about to...leave you there...Yeosin-san," he told her between ragged breaths.

Yeosin let out a gasp as she felt Kiku lift her into his arms. She wrapped her good arm around his neck, trying to hold on as he ran. She could hear his breathing, slightly labored from running with her. His heartbeat, fast but steady. He bolted through the gate, easing her back down while trying to catch his breath. Looking at him then, she couldn't help but smile. Regardless of the past, her brother had grown into a wonderful young man.

As soon as they had passed through, the gate slammed closed. She could hear the sounds of the North pounding to break through, but the gate and wall were well fortified. No one would pass through without permission. They would be killed before they could even try.

"I see you had the decency to return our beloved Yeosin, Honda Kiku," a stern voice broke through the ruckus.

Yeosin turned to see Nambu standing with a small guard of men. His eyes were furious. She could tell he was itching to reprimand them both for disobeying him, but she could also sense relief. That relief, however, was no match for the other emotions welling inside her most trusted advisor.

"Did he harm you, either of you?" his eyes narrowed.

"Kiku and my son saved us from that predicament," her smile was strained.

"Guards! Escort your Empress and our guest back to the South Wing. I have other matters to attend to," Nambu hissed.

"Guards, disregard that order. You will stay with Nambu-nim. That is an order," Yeosin barked.

Nambu glared.

"And do try to keep him in line, Taigeo Gun-in-nim," she whispered to the leader of the guard.

The man in question smirked.

With that, Yeosin led Kiku away. Keeping him close so her words would not be heard by others.

"Jinhong-ui Gisa is Nambu Gisa's younger twin brother. Jinhong-ui was not always named thus, but over the years, he has become a battle-crazed warrior. His lust for blood is great," she paused.

Upon nearing the entrance to the South Wing, she stopped.

"You probably don't remember. Back when I was still a country, the Gisa twins were my personal knights. When my land was split between my sons, so too, were the brothers. They are quite like my sons, at war with each other. Honda Kiku, you would do well to remember my words," Yeosin turned.

Her eyes held his gaze, demanding his full attention.

"Jinhong-ui will never forgive you. Out of all the creatures who haunt your steps, he is the most dangerous of all."

Japan hadn't remembered. He didn't remember much in regards to Yeosin's people, for better or worse. Perhaps he should have paid more attention.

Yeosin's warning about Jinhong-ui Gisa seemed omninous. He of course could guess that in the North there was no one they would rather bomb than him, but what Yeosin just told him seemed to bring this idea into sharp relief. The hate for him from that direction...

But, even so, Yeosin's Northern son actually seemed to have helped him back there. Granted, he was also helping his mother, but still - why was it that this man had more hate for Japan than his country did?

Japan's expression was somber. He thought of what to say in response.

"...I will take your words to heart, Yeosin-san," he finally told her. "But tell me - if you can - or if you will - what is it about this man that he seems to hold a bigger grudge against me than even your son does?"

Yeosin sighed, leading Kiku into the palace to her private chambers.

"Jin and Nambu are very important to me, Kiku, as I am to them. I took care of them as children, raised them to be splendid guards for the rulers of Korea, but they were adamant that they become my protectors," Yeosin smiled sadly.

She motioned for him to sit with her on a pile of cushions as she prepared tea for them both. Silbeo, her guardian wolf, came and rested his head on her lap.

"Nambu and Jin were captains of the my elite guard, the best of the best, but they failed in their duty. Clearly, though, they did not react in the same way."

She paused, pouring him some tea before settling back down.

"If you want to know why Jin hates you more than my son, you and I must be willing to confront the past. I...I am willing to try. Tell me, Kiku, what do you remember from those years? Do you remember what you did to me?"

Yeosin looked him straight in the eye, gaze never wavering even as her hands shook and tears formed.

"Tell me the story of our troubled past."

"...Our past?" Kiku gave Yeosin a look that said, 'are you sure you're okay to talk about this?' He was still a little worried and shaken about what they had just been through.

"I didn't remember much before today...I did remember that time I came to the village after...wait, did I pass out then?" With his newly recalled information, his mind was beginning to piece things together. He shook his head, clearing it again. "The memories are still like a dream or an out-of-body experience, or.... Sorry, I appear to be stalling."

He took a deep breath and let it out. "I remember...about...your back," he winced and continued. "...Following you...and....a bunch of military meetings...then there was the..." he trailed off and swallowed, he face turning pale. "...riots," he finished in a quieter voice. That was when she...

He hadn't been looking at her just now while he attempted to voice the recollections. He gave her a nervous glance.

---

So, back to this one, then. Wow, it's been awhile.

Yeosin just listened as the man in front of her struggled to piece together his memories.

"That is correct. This brand on my back was one of the first actions you took against me. You tried to separate my people from yours at first, but you wanted to give me a name of your own. The cruelty of naming was only made worse by the name itself. To add insult to injury, you began to burn my precious history books," Yeosin said softly.

This was difficult for both of them, that much she knew. For a brief instant, she doubted her decision. What good would come from reopening old wounds? There was no guarantee that this talk would help them heal. For all she knew, it could rekindle their old hatred and cause more problems. Despite knowing this, she continued.

"The riots...I have often asked myself if they were my fault. Perhaps if I had just suffered quietly, my people would not have been hurt. Jin would not be the way he is now. You asked me before why the man hates you while his brother holds you in cold regard. Let me tell you a story, Honda-nim, about the brother who hates you," Yeosin's steady gaze holding his.

"It has been so long since I last saw you, my son! Come, you must meet your sister. She was born after you and your brother left, and I never got the chance to write you," a young woman smiled at the boy.

Jeonsa was overwhelmed with the information, but happy. It would seem that his grandparents were in poor health, so his mother would leave soon to meet them. Im Haneul was currently playing with the girl, excited to have a moment to play after the rush of escaping the palace. He watched them play, making mental notes of what to tell his brother. Their sister had pretty hair, pure black, but it sparkled with a healthy shine. Chocolate brown orbs always smiling with laughter. Bubbly giggles. Shy smiles.

As the days passed, Jeonsa fell into a nostalgic haze. He knew that beyond the quiet village borders, his Empress was running for dear life. The Japanese were gaining control over the country. He scowled as he thought about the brand marring his lady's skin but was quickly brought out of his clouded thoughts by his sister's voice. Immediately, the world was bright again, an unstable peaceful life perched precariously close to the edge.

---
His mother was supposed to leave today, but she heard rumor that Korea would declare their independence tomorrow. With all the accompanying chaos, she thought it best to postpone her travels for another day or two. Jeonsa was happy he would be able to share this day with his mother. Over the past few weeks, he had begun to miss the simpleness of village life. A small part of him wanted to leave the palace to live here again with his mother and sister. What a nice life that would be...

"I only know this because I asked Jin what he did and where he went during our time of separation. Family means the world to Jin. He would do anything to protect it. His mother, sister, and brother make up but one part of his family. My sons and I make up another part."

Yeosin paused to look out the window of her room, across the gardens and courtyards in the direction of Jeam-ri.

"Honda Kiku, do you know what you did to that boy's family?" Yeosin asked.

---

I'M SO SORRY! I didn't mean to take this long to respond! I left for Tokyo but forgot to post about my absence. OTL I have a few days left of vacation, though, so I'll try to make up for my absence over the next few days. I'm really sorry!

Kiku was silent for some time, processing what Yeosin was telling him. Was it what he did? What others in his army had did? How much did the difference matter? He still held responsibility.

He looked down and slightly away. "I know that I hurt and killed so many that day that even with my memories returned, I can't really recall. I could guess the worst, from you implications. I surely understand that he hates me then, and I must think his brother is quite a strong and kind person to have been in the same room with me and mantained his composure."

Kiku raised his head again, but still looked slightly away. He opened his mouth as if to start speaking again, but closed it without a word.

He felt...he couldn't even place a word on how he felt. It was an empty feeling arising from a mixture of sadness, horror and self-disgust. It rendered him speechless.

---

And I'm sorry this took me days! And I don't have much of an excuse, either. I like repling fast so you can have it when you do get on, but sometimes I just can't think for the serious stuff. But take as much time as you need for yours, I totally understand.

"Do you remember the village of Jeam-ri? Your army herded the people into a church and locked the doors before setting it aflame. When villagers tried to escape, your soldiers began to shoot through the windows. His mother and his sister were in there, Honda-nim, but his brother does not know this. That is why his brother is able to keep his composure around you," Yeosin explained.

She felt so worn out now. All the emotions of the day had taken their toll. She remembered when Jeonsa told her his story. She remembered holding her crying son close to her, trying to comfort them both because the horrors they witnessed that day could never be erased from their minds. Jeonsa had begged for forgiveness for letting Haneul near the church. Yeosin knew he was not at fault though. After all, he had carried her son to safety despite having to leave his mother and sister to their death.

She looked at Kiku. For once, the young man looked... overwhelmed. It was strange to see him thus. Yeosin looked away, out the large windows and across the courtyard once more. She hadn't realized how much time had passed. Night would be waking soon. As the sunlight faded, it left a deep red tinge on the edge of the sky. Somehow, it was appropriate for this conversation, yet unsettling. Despite that feeling, Yeosin felt like, for the first time in many years, her sleep would be somewhat peaceful. Surely, the nightmares would not dissipate immediately, but perhaps tonight would not find her waking in cold sweat, shaking with anger and sadness.

"It is getting late. We can continue this tomorrow. For now, let us eat a light meal and sleep. You may stay here for the night. Rest assured, you will not be bothered or otherwise harassed," Yeosin said quietly, moving to let an attendant know of her plans.

"How many years has it been since you last stayed here?" she mused.

---

No worries! Take your time with your responses. I appreciate that you try to reply quickly, but don't feel like you have to rush. It's hard for me to think of things too. Serious stuff just gets kind of tough to write about after a while, right?

Kiku was silent while Yeosin explained. Now he was able to understand. The other brother didn't know...

He didn't know what to feel.

He broke out of his state at her question and blinked. How long had it been? Stayed as a guest, or.... No, wait, it didn't matter. As a guest. The other him had never slept here, possibly out of the fear that he would wake up as...well, him. Perhaps there were other reasons as well.

Regardless, the last time he had actually slept in the palace, it was as a guest. And that was a long time ago.

"It has been many years." And for them, the word 'many' was longer than what most would understand. "Everything has changed since then."

Yeosin smiled softly. Everything had changed. This palace of hers, once complete and filled with laughter was now divided, half of it resting in darkness. But that wasn't the only thing that had changed. Looking at Kiku now, she realized they had both changed in the time they had been apart.

"It's strange. We live so long, change is something we see quite often, but it never ceases to amaze me. Sometimes, it is hard to accept those changes. In that respect, we are like humans," Yeosin snuck a glance at the man next to her.

Before she could say anything else, the attendant arrived, informing Yeosin that they had prepared the room next to hers for Kiku. A light meal and freshly made bed was waiting for him. Yeosin thanked the attendant before personally seeing Kiku to his room. When they entered, Yeosin made her way over to the window, opening it slightly, letting the moonlight fill the room. Gesturing for Kiku to sit, she poured him a cup of tea before opening a dresser drawer.

"There are extra nightclothes in here. Please feel free to make use of them. Also, tomorrow morning I will send an attendant in to draw a bath for you. Sleep well, Kiku-nim," Yeosin bowed.

Before Kiku could find a proper response to her words, an attendant came informing them of the room arrangements. He thanked the attendant as well, and let Yeosin lead him.

The room was extremely nice. Better than he probably deserved. Everything had been prepared. "Thank you, Yeosin-san," he told her once she had showed him everything, "thank you very much." He bowed back to her as he said these words. "And you also. Sleep well, Yeosin-san."

Kiku hoped she could sleep better than she had these years. He hoped she could sleep without seeing images called up from the horror that had happened. He didn't know if this could be true yet, but he did sincerely wish it.

He turned his face toward the moonlight, as if asking it for quiet assistance.